Sex is a sacred gift from God. As such it is holy, pure, and undefiled. And it is also private. Because it is private, a sacred “mystery” of the union of man and woman, husband and wife, we do not share with others the intimate details of spousal sex. It is one of the most open and vulnerable moments in our lives.
Those who desire to fully emotionally, physically, and spiritually satisfy the sex needs of their spouse (a much better word than “partner”) will do all they can to learn what “works” best for them. A man will learn how to touch his wife’s breast, and caress her secret parts in a way that pleases her. Does she like her clitoris stimulated manually, orally, or both? Does her clitoris respond best to a direct and forceful oral caress, or gentler? Does she like to have an orally stimulated orgasm before intercourse is initiated, or does she want to be brought to the brink and be then swept over by the delight of her husband’s erection entering her body? These are things only a faithful loving husband will know. They are sacred mysteries.
And a wife also will learn over time just what brings the most sexual joy and satisfaction to her husband. How does he like his erect penis stroked? Does he like to have his balls caressed during foreplay, or squeezed, lightly or with more pressure? Is he anally sensitive? When he is ready to climax during intercourse, what parts of his body can she touch that will help bring him over the edge, or add more intensity to the ecstasy? Does he only want intercourse, or does he occasionally like to lay back and have his wife lubricate his penis with lotion and caress him to orgasm? Again, these too are sacred mysteries.
Sacred mysteries are not meant to be shared over the water cooler, in the locker room, in internet chat rooms, or anywhere else for that matter. They are holy and private, secrets between a husband and wife.
And the thing that applies to spousal sex also, in some ways, applies to solo sex. Sole sex as well is a precious, wonderful sacred gift from God. It is meant to be enjoyed to the fullest, in all of its mysterious splendour. It is a way of enjoying the gift of pleasure God placed in our bodies, which are holy and pure. Marriage does not make our physical self holy. The act of creation accomplished that divine purpose.
We may not need to be as private about the intimate acts of masturbation we enjoy, simply because it does not involve the sexual secrets of another. There may be a time and place, if we are courageous enough to do so, to share with a friend which sexual toys we find most helpful in making masturbation as pleasurable as God intends it to be. For example, if we are Fleshlight fans, which orifice and inserts have we found most helpful (the STU is amazing.) And have we discovered any other sexual toys that are worth a try? If I didn’t think talking about such things was legitimate, then obviously there is no way that I could have developed this website.
But there are other aspects of solo sex in which it wise to maintain our privacy. Take our “toys” for instance. If you are 19 and still living at home with you parents, it might be best if you didn’t keep your favourite strokers in plain view on your nightstand. In fact, it would probably be best if you found a discrete hiding place for it. And if you are older and occasionally have company, keeping it anywhere in the open just does not seem to be wise. We all know you enjoy your private penile pleasures. We know you do because we do it as well. But, being an exhibitionist just is not the way to go.
Delete, Delete, Delete
And what about your internet activities? You may not want everyone to know you have been reading up on sexual matters, especially masturbation. You may not even want anyone else who has access to the computer you are using right now to know that you have visited (and hopefully enjoyed) this “Christians and Solo Sex” website. This URL is easy enough to remember for your next visit so it just makes sense, before you conclude this internet session, to move your curser to the top right of the page, click on “Tools,” and then “Delete Browsing History,” and at least delete your “files,” “history,” and “forms.” And this is certainly good advice if you are one of those people who use the internet (especially on a shared computer) to access erotica as an aid to your masturbation. There are even online sites where you can store your bookmarks and access them from there.
I also have Windows password protected. Anyone else with access to my computer uses the “guest” account.
After each and every internet session I go through the above “privacy assurance” routine. I do this even though I am the only one who uses this computer, just to stay on the safe side. Plus, I operate this site anonymously. No one in my life knows that I do this, and no one who visits this site knows my identity.
While researching and working on this site I also do a fair amount of “bookmaking” of sites to which I want to return and do further study. But, in order to maintain my privacy here I label the site something else when bookmaking it.
Ialso keep many of my files and other things I want to keep private in a “locked” folder that can only be opened with a password. In order to do this I had to order a special program. The one I use is called “Folder Lock,” and I recommend it highly. No one but me knows that I have these files on Solo Sex, or where to find them. And the route to them is “buried” deep in my program files.
I do not take these precautions in any way due to shame, but just simple common sense. And you know, a little bit of common sense can go a long way, and sometimes save us as whole heap of misery.